My son’s old enough to attend the tot services at our Temple this year and I’m taking him there in lieu of the regular two-hour shofar extravaganza. But my choice to tot and not attend the traditional service has me a bit ferklempt.
Am I copping out with the tot?
I’ve copped out before. Last year, I skipped fasting on Yom Kippur. The thought of going without caffeine and food while caring for a six-month-old was too daunting. I didn’t fast the year before either, but hey, I was pregnant after all. This year, I have no real excuse, so I’ll try my hand at not eating all day, even though my son will be shoveling in mac n’ cheese to his heart’s content.
I can live with that.
Trying to convince myself that attending the tot service is remotely similar to going to the real deal is a little bit more difficult.
For one, the tot service is shorter. I haven’t seen the prayer book yet for the kiddies, but it must be thinner than the chunk of the “High Holidays†prayer book that I leaf through every time before I sit down for services. (It doesn’t ever really change, though, does it?)
Also, since tots can’t keep their mouth shut there will be no expectation for me to be quiet either. Meaning, I won’t have to pretend to be paying attention when all I really want to do is gossip with my mom or friend about all the good outfits I’m looking at. No one will care if I’m whispering a bit, because it will be at a lower decibel than a screaming two-year-old.
I won’t have to worry about when I’m going to eat. We all know tots can’t go more than an hour without snacking, and well, neither can I. I wonder if I need to bring my own honey?
All joking aside, there are real reasons I’m opting for tot this year. I want my son to enjoy going to Temple with his parents. I want him to get used to the surroundings and the culture. I want him to meet other nice Jewish boys and girls. He doesn’t have to marry them, but some friends would be a good start.
And while the tot might not be the “real deal†it provides the perfect opportunity for my husband and me to kvell over our pride and joy for a whole hour. And who would ever want to opt out of an opportunity to do that?
Not this Jewish mother. Happy New Year.
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Cross-posted at Your Jewish Mother
{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }
The tot service sounds awesome. What’s not to love?! I’ve thought about volunteering for our kid service at church just for the snacks and coloring.
Happy New Year!
That’s what I am doing as well!
Happy New Year!
Sounds reasonable to me. Besides, it’s amazing how much the littles ones can teach us.
Who knows…you might learn more in the tot service than the adult one…
I love the graphic! It’s like Jewish Schoolhouse Rock.
Susan at Working Moms Against Guilt
http://www.workingmomsagainstguilt.com
shonah tovah
Ok, your comment about the nice Jewish girls cracked me up. N’s family constantly jokes about sending D to India to secure a bride.
When did we become the moms that want to marry off our sons before they start kindergarten? Oh the irony.
Happy New Year! I would totally do the tot service.
You’re not the only one who thinks a tot service is preferrable to a grown up one. If only the people in charge would figure that out and tailor the main services to be more enjoyable, we wouldn’t have to search for excuses to weasel out of them!
Totally with you. We missed Rosh Hashanah services due to our latest lice outbreak (don’t get me started), but we’ll be at the Yom Kippur family (aka “tot”) service at our temple. At least our Rabbi is smart enough to call it a family service so that families with younger children (not just tots) would at least attend ONE service.