Sometimes I feel like this frugal thing is making me a lonely lame-ass.
“Want to go out to dinner tomorrow night with the kids?”
“Uhm, only if it’s Man Jo Vin.” (Where everything is under $3. And greasy)
“Want to make a lunch date?”
“Want to come here and eat?”
“How about a shopping excursion?”
“I’ll come watch you.”
As if motherhood is hard enough, now I feel guilty making plans that involve money. And we all know that when it’s nice out on a Tuesday morning there’s no better way to kill time than to sit at Starbucks with a friend and watch your kids eat their scones and make a mess on somebody else’s floor. And then make a fast getaway before all the employees realize it’s your hellions who’ve ruined their floor.
There are only so many times a bag lunch will cut it.
In fact, when I busted out the turkey slices, cheese and clementine today at the zoo, all I got from my son was, “I want to eat out somewhere.”
It’s all I can do to not grab him by the arm and say, “do you know how lucky you are to be able to eat overpriced organic no preservative turkey?!”
He doesn’t yet, but I know that even though we’re eating out less, we’re very lucky. We have our jobs, our health, and the ability to spend $44 on one bag of groceries at Whole Foods that we’ll actually eat and not totally flip out. Yet.
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It’s a bummer, especially when we have to say no to our kids. This morning I said no to my daughter who wanted some money to buy a bunch of junk jewelry from an event they’re having at her school today. Thing is, she SO doesn’t need the junk. She decided to use her own money. I would rather she not buy anything at all, but it’s her choice. She’ll figure out how to save when she doesn’t have any money left for the next thing she really wants.
I actually think this economy thing is good for us and our kids to help them understand that we’re not made of money.
I feel your pain!!!!!!!
I’ve been blogging about similar things. I never realized how much my life revolved around going out for a bite to eat or a drink or a coffee….
Sucks.
Ah, teaching kids about money. I’m still working on this with my son. My new line with him “Not today. Maybe another day.”
Now he says that whenever we go to the toystore “Mom, maybe I can get this on another day.”
I’m not looking forward to the day when he realizes, that the day ain’t ever coming.
It takes a while, but eventually you will all adjust. Frugal is the new “cool” trend, so soon everyone will think the way you do. It’s hard to remember what we spent money on before our girls were born because now everything revolves around paying the bills and saving for college and retirement.
Whenever someone mentions getting together for coffee, I suggest a walk. There’s a great indoor track near me (with childcare), so the weather does not affect our plans. Instead of sitting on my bum drinking up calories, I can get a bit of exercise while visiting with a friend. Of course, my kids are school-age, so it’s easy to schedule with out them– and there’s one less mouth to feed if i make than coffee date, anyway.
And all those substitutes for eating out take effort and pre-planning. And then you have to fake the perky “aren’t we having fun” attitude to go with them. Sigh….