It’s hard enough to keep up with my kid, my house, my hair, my grocery list, twitter/ facebook/ blog/ articles/ f’ing around on the internet, without trying to figure out exactly how to maximize and make relevant twitter/ facebook/ blog/ articles/ internet f’ing around.
And what I mean is I’m having a bit of a mom-life crisis. I can’t figure out where I’m supposed to fit in in the world of moms/ marketers/ writers/ bloggers/ friends.
I’m so not a #mom. I can’t seem to find a good hashtag for myself.
I’ve turned down a lot of PR and product opportunities by my own choice, so I’ll never be one a Frigidaire Mom or a mom who went on a cool Disney trip. That’s cool, I love all the people who write me and include me, but I don’t need or want for much so I typically say no. That means I’ll probably never use the #I’mcoolenoughtogetfreestuff moniker.
I used to feel a part of the internet group of working moms, but no more. Now I’m an off-ramped mom, stay-at-home mom, spoiled mom, frugal mom, neurotic mom. Is there a hashtag yet for #cantfindalabelmom?
It’s hard enough to be a parent without having someone label you. Only to feel like you don’t live up to the labels. In my past lives I’ve always been labeled something. High school was “Most Gullible” (I’m not joking.) College I was in a popular sorority, although I never felt I fit into the blonde-haired, blue-eyed mold of other members. Post-college, I did the “Murray Hill” in NYC thing and was a “dot-comer.” #boyIusedtobereallylame
More labels ensued when I left New York. I didn’t do the MBA thing but was an IMC’er instead. I married young, had a kid and moved to a yuppie-ish neighborhood. I went back to work, I started a blog, I quit my job, bought a hybrid SUV. #youknowhowthestorygoes
Now, I’m enjoying my SAHM status, but I don’t want to be lumped into #soccermoms. Neither my kid nor I really like soccer anyway. I don’t want to have a 9-5 job right now, but I’m not sure my pithy freelance writing assignments qualify me to be a WAHM. #mommywarsrearitsuglyhead
Marketers, writers, relatives and friends always want to label us. We all label ourselves as well – just look at all of our blog names. But even my own blog label and tagline doesn’t mean I’ve found my niche. It doesn’t mean I necessarily need the niche, but sometimes it’d be nice to #findtheperfectfit.
{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }
I think your argument of not fitting in is what makes you fit so well! So many moms are in the same spot – because even if we do know where we fit, we’re often looking over the picket fence or to the next baseball diamond thinking that’s where we want to be.
#bewhereyouare and #don’tworryaboutit
Sounds familiar. I got my degree, got married, worked my way up the ranks in a tech company, had 2 kids and returned to work after each, used to spend money without thinking about it, etc., etc. Then my baby kept getting sick. We decided that it was best to pull him out of daycare and I quit my job. Now I spend time reading/writing blogs, twittering, facebooking, in addition to all my #mom responsibilities. I am happy with the decision to leave work but don’t feel as though I fit into any of the pre-defined labels. But, I’m okay with that. I actually kind of enjoy being a bit different and not fitting into any one bucket. Now I should get off my butt and do something around here before I get labeled #lazymom.
I agree with Amy. So much.
I think we’re all looking for a place to belong…mainly because this whole role of “mom” doesn’t mean the same thing woman to woman/kid to kid or even day to day. I used to struggle with this (okay, I still do), but I think I’m coming to realize that not having a firm “place” means I get to be lots of different people and I’d much rather explore those roads than be stuck on some sort of predetermined path.
As long as you have friends who “get” you, who needs a label? And when was the last time you heard a man stressing over what label best applies to his working or parenting style?
Seems to me if you don’t “match” #anyoneelse that you’re your own brand, your own niche, your own insertbuzzword here. And most of all your own person.
Which I’ve found to be enough. For me.
I’ve decided my group must be “people who have never even heard of the term hashtag.”
Does this mean I’ve been living in a cave? : )
Thanks for all the comments! I love being my own person, but I hate that a lot of times others, including those who want to market to us, put specific labels on our parenting. It just gets a little demeaning after awhile.
i love this post! it’s so true.
#doYOU