From the category archives:

Activism

We done good.

by selfmademom on July 14, 2010 · 4 comments

Before there were endless PR pitches, link contests, product reviews and the feeling that if your blog doesn’t have 72 ad banners and 25 comments per post you’re a complete failure, there was just writing on your blog for fun, meeting up for a good time and feeling that you were a part of something special.

I’ll be honest that as the blogosphere and mom-o-sphere have grown, I’ve had that feeling less and less. Maybe it’s my fault. Perhaps all the personal gains and losses I’ve had over the last four years sent me further away from the blog community when it should have been pulling me toward it. But, whatever the case, I had an experience today that made me remember all the things I love about being a blogger and why I continue to write and post.

I was part of a select group of bloggers participating in a program coordinated by The Motherhood to partake in a day of good deeds: “Do Good Day.” It was sponsored by 77Kids, a new store for girls, boys and babies by American Eagle. I love Cooper and Emily having connected with them in blog years past, and was really excited by the opportunity to work with them.

Led by the mighty Hyacinth and Melissa here in Chicago (there were teams of 7 bloggers in 10 other cities around the country doing good today too), we agreed on a Do Good Day program: Bake for the tenants of the Ronald McDonald House and then pass out $77 worth of $1 bills at random in the afternoon on our own.

Thanks to resident bakers Emily and Michelle, we made a cake and thumbprint cookies for the residents of the RMH. In a conversation with a resident couple before we started cooking, I was told of the hardship families must endure when their kids are at Children’s Memorial Hospital, but the family residence is in another city completely. For these families who are already shouldering the burden of the high cost of healthcare, saving money on meals and hotel rooms is a necessity. RMH pays for 100 percent of their living expenses. Residents can stay there for as long as they want. Soda only costs $0.25 from the vending machine. Amazing.

Also, 77Kids included for each of us a “goodie” box filled with the $77 to pass out as well as goodie bags, an adorable (and high quality) tee shirt for my eldest and thank you notes to pass out at the organizations at which we were volunteering.

Since I brought baby burrito, I was not in charge of baking. Which is a good thing, because there’s nothing I do worse than bake. So baby burrito and I wrote some thank you notes, clipped money and gave all of Theresa’s (count ‘em) SEVEN kids someone to watch and play with. We laughed, shared stories and learned a lot about how lucky we are.

I had to leave early to go to an appointment for baby burrito, but I wish I could have stayed longer to chat and gab with the amazing women in the room. It was that intangible good feeling I had when I left that I had done a good deed and had a nice morning with interesting women that reminds me why I stay connected and committed to the blogosphere.

And it was nice to be a part of a company-sponsored experience that didn’t feel pushy, sales-y. Just Good-y.

Full disclosure: I was compensated to be a part of the 77Kids team and to post and tweet about my experience. However, the mushy, gushy bloggy-love feelings are all mine. You can’t pay for that.

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A whole other look at Whole Foods

by selfmademom on July 8, 2010 · 5 comments

I shop at the Lincoln Park Whole Foods almost once a week not infrequently. At first, the store, a behemoth grocery store by any standards, let alone a Whole Foods, scared me. But I’ve grown to love the size, the selection, and especially, the sushi bar. (I even got Cyn to meet me there once.)

Which is why I was appalled and horrified that a local mom, Lisa Portes, was BANNED from Whole Foods for LIFE for accidentally taking out a $15 bottle of chewable vitamins amidst a clusterf*** of epic proportions with her kids. (Full story in Chicago Magazine via Windy Citizen.)

Everyone who has children, babysat children, or watched children from afar can understand how difficult it is to grocery shop (or do any kind of shopping) with kids. Just the baggage and items alone needed to keep them occupied, dry, sanitized and fed is enough without remembering the grocery list, your wallet, and your own, sustainable shopping bags. (Portes gets extra props for those.)

So what, she paid for the groceries, left, forgot another item and went back to get it, took her kids to the bathroom and forgot to pay. Was that worth the shakedown by the security guard in the parking lot, a Whole Foods “mug” shot and directive to never step foot in the store again?

I think not.

I remember fondly when Kristen forgot to pay for the duck that accidentally fell into her shopping cart. Was that worth the $6.95 to take her kids out of the car, go back and pay? Readers were mixed, but I know that I wouldn’t have gotten out of my car at that moment to return it.

We all have our bad moments as mothers. And apparently Chicago does not like when moms have those moments, or moms in public in general (as referenced by the comments to this story and the Stroller Wars story that I was a part of.) Not all of us are a texting, careless, maniacal bunch.

I personally think it’s clear that Portes did not intend to steal the vitamins. It’s also clear that a company has a policy against shoplifting and I cannot fault Whole Foods for adhering to policy.

But where’s the middle ground? It’s not like Portes was a repeat offender. It’s not like she didn’t offer to pay. I’m not sure how the Whole Foods organization works, but most companies I’ve worked with over the years with regards to employee relations give managers the ability to assess the situation of their own store or office and make an informed decision based on that.

Rather, what it seems, is that everyone likes a scapegoat, especially when it’s a harried mom. It’s easy to judge that mom and assume the worst. She was an easy target for the bored security guard in the parking lot. As Portes says, “They didn’t leave the slightest margin for human error.” And that seems exactly like what it was. Human error. We all err as humans.

Even the crazy Chicago mom haters.

Even the manager and the security guard at Whole Foods.

I love the store, the products and the people I encounter at Whole Foods. But I’m not a fan of the way they handled this situation or their inane, inflexible policy. It makes me wonder who’s looking over my shoulder as I soldier on through the vast aisles of the store. I better make sure I triple check my cart on the way out.

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My romance: Chemical free

by selfmademom on June 16, 2010 · 2 comments

Apparently my last post with the link to all the bad ingredients in sunscreen hit home with y’all. My friends have been calling and emailing about it, and I’ve been proselytizing chemical-free sunscreen like Heidi does her plastic surgery. So, because you didn’t asked I’m using Badger for my husband and I and California Baby for the kids (it made my husband’s face way too zinc-oxide white to use on me.) I’m happy I found sunscreen that doesn’t have the dreaded Oxybenzone in it, and to be honest, these brands work way better than the spray-on cancer crap that I used last year. I have this love-hate thing with chemicals in beauty products, you see.

Moving on, earlier today, my friend and I had a thrilling discussion about how far we are taking our chemical-free romances. You know I have green guilt. I’m never as green as I should be. Same goes for my love of chemical-free beauty products. Because you can’t take the paraben out of the concealer and still think it’s going to conceal.

So because again, you didn’t asked, I’ll tell you what I’m doing to ensure that my skin is as pure and sweet as the Diet Coke I had this afternoon.

I stopped using soaps and body lotions with artificial ingredients and artificial fragrances. I switched to Burt’s Bees, but apparently that, too, has some question about the fragrances they use, but it says 99 gazillion percent natural and I’m pretty impressed with their voluminous FAQ pages. Plus, my husband thinks this whole thing is so crazy and if I spend any more money on body wash I’m a dead woman.
I switched my lip gloss. I’m obsessed with lip balm and gloss, especially ones that have SPF. I was using Neutrogena MoistureShine Lip Soother which I loved almost as much as my Diet Coke and slathered on my lips 50 times a day, but then found out that it had the dreaded Oxybenzone, and I was basically eating it all day long and I decided that was probably not so great for my health. So I went to Whole Foods and found Hemp Organic Lip Tint which has sun protection in it. It also has something called carmine, which some people freak out about, but I was just glad I wasn’t ingesting the dreaded Oxybenzone. And, I actually like the consistency of it (but I do miss my Neutrogena poison.)
As for my face, I really really am addicted to my Bobbi Brown foundation stick. Concealer is pretty much the one thing I don’t leave the house without. But, Alison told me all these great things about Jane Iredale makeup and how it’s all natural and they sell it at Pure Beauty so I thought I would try her concealer. But it really sucked, I’m sorry to say. It didn’t cover up jack sh**. I’m sure there are other amazing natural concealers out there, but I draw the line when it comes to zits.
And, I draw the line when it comes to deodorant. I know aluminum may cause alzheimers and I’m probably spreading cancer around my body every day by using it, but I cannot go au natural with the deo for the B.O. Again, I tried. I really did. With Aubrey Organics. But people, I need an anti-perspirant like the Queen needs her tiara. Do you love me for trying?

(Btw, for more organic beauty tips, check out Robin’s great organic beauty blog.)

So that being said, I’ve happily made the switch to more natural lotions and creams, but I’m still going to be the lovely blemish-free, sweet-smelling friend you all know me as.

Oh, and if this hasn’t made you crazy enough already did you hear about the lead in our kid’s juice boxes? I may have to start growing grapes on my roofdeck and do the Lucy dance.

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Green Guilt

by selfmademom on April 6, 2010 · 7 comments

You all know I’ve been trying to live more “green,” but my efforts are just resulting in another big G: Guilt. Every time I’m not being green I feel guilty.

Green Guilt - it’s almost as bad as the Jewish or mommy kind. Trust me on this one.

I can’t use a plastic bag without wondering where it will go after I’ve disposed of it. The paper towel roll looks at me with a sad face each time I rip a sheet off. The never-ending pile of cardboard boxes leftover from baby gifts is becoming tragic. I read articles, like this one from Time magazine (thanks, Allison) and go apoplectic that everything I’m using in my house will kill me and my children one day. Who can live with that?

And don’t get me started about the inlaws who were in town this weekend. I tried to dissuade them from water bottle, paper plate and plastic silverware use, but it fell on mostly deaf ears. I love them dearly, but they make a lot of waste.

I keep trying to be better about my environmental footprint, but time, energy and unintelligible ingredient lists (on both natural and chemical-laden products) keep weighing me down. For instance, I bought the Korres and Boscia beauty products at Ulta to replace all my over-the-counter-crapola and found out that really, they’re not as natural as I thought. $185 later it didn’t seem worth it to shlep with the baby all the way back down to the store for a few misguided chemicals. Maybe in 25 years when my skin turns blue I’ll regret it, but last Tuesday it seemed the rationale decision.

It’s all just getting to be a little much. I drive the hybrid car. I try to keep up with the movers and shakers in the green world to stay on top of trends. I don’t use plastic in excess. I just spent a gazillion dollars on the most eco-green-reusable-phlalate-BPA-free lunch bag for my son possible.

But I can’t be Green perfect.

I am never going to buy unbleached, rough toilet paper. I like my triple-ply Charmin Ultra. I’m never going to cloth diaper my baby; I just think it wastes water anyway. I’ve switched all our home cleaning products to more natural-formulated versions of the original, but sometimes I just want to use a freaking Clorox wipe to get the kiddie poop out of the toilet. I bring my own shopping bags to the grocery store, but often I’ve forgotten them and have to ask for more.

I guess as all things, it’s about compromises, and so instead of feeling guilty all the time, I’m just going to compromise on my green life. If I can walk, I will (see: yesterday’s 5 pm shlep back from the park.) If I can do the organic, locally-grown meal, of course I’ll choose that. But, hey, I grew up on McDonald’s and Domino’s pizza every weekend and I turned out okay I guess.

The Green Guilt is getting to me, but it will not overcome me.

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A reminder to think green

by selfmademom on March 10, 2010 · 2 comments

Every month I coordinate a topical discussion with a speaker for parents of my son’s preschool. And every time one of these smart and distinguished speakers appears I walk away more informed and also a little bat sh** crazy.

Today, we had the pleasure of listening to the well-spoken Allison of Ecominders who helps people to remember to be green and reminded me of all the dangers lurking around my house.

The one I’m most mad about right now? That my new and fabulous Ice Mountain water cooler stores its water in BPA laden water jugs. I should have known and looked for that devilish #7, but I was naive and really was enjoying the hot tap. I’m not totally down on Ice Mountain, though. When I called and asked the company about BPA in their water jugs, the customer service rep had her talking points at the ready. But even if the ingestible amount in the plastic is .001 I still don’t want it near my baby.

So besides getting bat sh** crazy at myself for not being more dilligent in my research, what else can I do? Go back to good ‘ol Chicago City tap I guess.

Tagged as: Green Living

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H1N1 vaccine: Lucky to get one

October 29, 2009

It’s hard to put into words what it took for me to finally get the H1N1 vaccine yesterday, 38 and 6 days pregnant. There were the phone calls, the texts, the emails (yes, we’re quite the tech-savvy pair) to my OB/GYN office. There was the nagging of pediatrician offices (they had it for my son before I [...]

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We have nothing to fear but endocrine disrupting chemicals

September 18, 2009

I’m not a hysteric about making my house an organic haven, or making sure my kid can speak Tibetan by age 4, or worrying about the effects of Dora the Explorer’s shrill voice on my son’s eardrums. But lately, I have taken to trying to eradicate certain ingredients from our food, like high fructose corn syryp, [...]

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HFCS in our food: an update

August 23, 2009

I rarely use my blog to wax poetic about various causes as you all probably know. I’m just not that deep. But there are a few causes that I will advocate for: BPA in bottles and other household products. And shame on you Sigg! Excessive swag Trying to be frugal (Which is impossible to be, by the [...]

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