I saw the grand possibilities of having a baby again… more sitter hours, portability, and having a child who wouldn’t talk back to me. What I didn’t realize was how impossible it would be to do the little things I had gotten accustomed to as being a mother of one. So, herewith, a list:
- It’s impossible to blog anymore. I’m pretty sure that my baby burrito has memorized the QWERTY keyboard. He even smiles when the Windows “musack” comes on after I power on.
- I haven’t peed alone in 2 months. I finally got to the point of “Peeing in Peace“ and now everytime I have to go, someone cries.
- I can’t remember diddly. Calendar appointments are now reserved for remembering to call my mom.
- It’s virtually a miracle if my clothes are clean. At least when I had one, I could change my top if it had spit up on it. Now, I don’t notice the spit up until I’ve already been out to a lunch date, play date and kiddie soccer class. And noticing it on my new cashmere sweater was not appreciated either.
- Having a conversation. I’m happy now if I can talk to someone either in person or on the phone uninterrupted for 3.5 minutes.
- I have no trunk space left in my car. Putting the items I buy from Target away in the trunk around the double stroller requires a degree in spatial relations.
- I can’t get anywhere at the time I intend. I book appointments at least 15 minutes after my desired target arrival time.
- My beloved well-manicured nails are a total thing of the past. And the do-it-yourself jobbies just don’t cut it.
- I’d add sleep to this list, but my 3 year-old has decided not to sleep through the night anymore, so I wouldn’t be getting much anyway.
- Finally, though, it’s impossible to have thought that after only two months of being a mother of two, I’d love my kids this much. Even without the sleep, the well-preserved nails, the phone conversations, it’s so worth it.
by selfmademom on October 12, 2009 · 1 comment
I knew this would happen. Motivation to do anything but nap, clean up around the house and fret about having another child has officially set in. I have stopped all “professional” commitments before my “maternity leave.”
I did, however, write a couple more articles for Chicago Parent before the newborn phase sets in. This month’s article is about … wait for it … Dr. Harvey Karp’s “Happiest Toddler on the Block” book. After this one, I promise I’m done drooling over his books and blog posts. Promise.
And, I’m still wearing lululemon consistently, but now, it’s more out of necessity. The thought of putting real pants on these days makes me cringe.
So don’t be surprised if I teeter on the fringe of the blog world for a little while… I’m still here.
Ah yes, I’ve been quite AWOL around here lately, haven’t I?
Well, all I can say is that if you’ve:
a) been on a bumpy turbo-prop flight over the Rockies
b) watched your son boot all over your husband and himself mid-flight
c) you yourself boot upon landing and a bumpy descent
d) drag your screaming, underwear-only clad child screaming through the airport so that you can put him into clean clothes
e) barely make your connection back to Chicago only to learn that your husband had to sweetly coax the ramp agent to get himself new pants
f) then sit aboard another bumpy flight where your son proceeds to boot again (I caught it in the bag that time, and yes, I am very proud of that one)
g) wait on the tarmac one hour before heading to your gate upon landing
h) arrive home 10 hours after you left on what was supposed to be a 4 hour trip
Well, then, you’d be AWOL too.
More soon, I promise, once I stop rehashing the details of the world’s most-comical, yet messy flight experience.
As we all know, I’m not much for online contests, or linking, or really anything related tangentially to my blog other than what I feel like writing about at any given moment, but when I got an e-mail from a nice woman named Tracey, with a subject line that read, “Loved ‘The Great Underwear Experiment,’” well … I was beyond skeptical.
But for some odd reason, I decided to read the e-mail and realized what an idiot I was. I wrote a post with that exact same title about 4 months ago. What a coincidence! So I decided to read further. And I was shocked with what I found.
The e-mail author Tracey had actually read the post I wrote, had some follow up questions for me about it (yes, my mad method worked in about a week), and oh, yeah, she was doing research for a new blog for American Standard toilets called Professor Toilet and they had come across so many funny toilet stories online they created an interactive awards list for their new blog, and I was a nominee in their Best Potty Training Advice category.
She coddled my ego by saying I wasn’t a D-lister, and then THANKED ME FOR MY BLOG.
First I laughed out loud that this was my new claim to fame (and yes, I won the category, if you must know). And then I was shocked. Here was an email from a person doing blogger outreach, or PR for American Standard and I was asked to do nothing for their new site or brand. No products being pushed (although I could use a new scrubber, hint hint 
), no links being asked of me, and no “can you spread the word about our new site?” mumbo jumbo.
Nope, for one of the few times in my two-plus years of blogging someone just thought I was funny.
This of course led me on a mad search through the Professor Toilet site (I didn’t know how funny people who make toilets can be) and a realization that without the slightest nudge, beg, trickery or giveaway I happily spent 20 minutes perusing information about flushing, toilet humor and saving water.
And now of course, I’m writing about it, because that’s what I’ll do for a company that made me chuckle and had connected with me through my blog in a unique and non-overbearing way. So often we write about bad pitches, promos, ads, etc. But many professionals, like Tracey, get it right and when they do, it builds that authentic experience with the person and the brand, that is worth way more than a $2 coupon for wipes.
So, kudos. American Standard and Tracey and your team. Thanks for making me laugh and for doing my former professional field proud. Even though we’re a Kohler household (sorry, we live close enough to Kohler, WI that we have little choice), I’m now American Standard at heart.
p.s. thanks to Jean for the blog post title. You still got it, girl!
Even though I swore up and down that I’m “over” BlogHer and the swag and the parties, I can’t stop thinking and reading about it all – the bag of stuff just sitting under my desk, the pocket video camera that was the “sought after” swag to get at the parties. (Which, I “called” and “took” from my friend as we were divvying up the goods. I can’t believe I actually did that and then joked about it. )
It all is just not sitting so well with me, so in a moment of materialistic Zen, I decided to do something a little rash (for me at least.) I’m auctioning it all off on eBay for charity (The Chicago Abortion Fund.) If you’re pissed you didn’t get Crocs (which aren’t in the bag, btw because I knew I wouldn’t wear them although they looked comfy), or you really want that Little Giraffe neck pillow, or you’re yearning for some more zip drives, PLEASE BID.
Oh yeah, and that Kodak pocket video camera is in there as well.
It’s all going to a better cause than for my personal gain. I do appreciate what all the sponsors were doing for us, but I know someone out there will use what’s in the bag more than I and I want to give back a little something to a dear friend and a woman’s right to choose.
Here’s the link to the auction again:
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=270434999042&ru=http%3A%2F%2Fshop.ebay.com%3A80%2F%3F_from%3DR40%26_trksid%3Dp3907.m38.l1313%26_nkw%3D270434999042%2B%2B%26_sacat%3DSee-All-Categories%26_fvi%3D1&_rdc=1
Please help me spread the word!
Tagged as:
BlogHer swag,
eBay
I’ve never been on The Price is Right or Wheel of Fortune, but after my whirlwind experience at BlogHer, I think I’ve had enough “brought to you by…” to last me a lifetime. Last time I went to BlogHer, there were sponsors and swag to be found, but this time around it felt more like a game show than a conference.
Fortunately, there’s only so much swag a pregnant achy back can lug around, so I mostly ignored all the “paid for,” “sponsored by,” and “here here take my business card and my giveaway from my sponsor,” chatter. Of course, like she said, not all bloggers are like that, and not all parts of the conference were like that. And the time I spent away from the Expo Hall in the hallway outside of the actual sessions with my blog BFFs and at the two parties I went to made all the crazy sponsorship-advertisement-self-promotion hell disappear like all my business cards did in those giveaway bowls. (I didn’t say I didn’t want to get some free shit.)
I even shared some of my free shit with her, Marketing Mommy (R). But I kept the Kodak thing-y. Cause I got there first, ya know.
And of course BlogHer wouldn’t be BlogHer if there wasn’t some controversy over something. Put thousands of women together and the claws come out. This year, it was bringing babies to parties, bars, events, sessions, what have you. Of course, the only baby I brought was the one that was pressing on my bladder the whole time and well, I don’t think it bothered anyone except the hotel bathroom which I visited too many times to count.
Speaking of people, because I was a lame-ass attendee who couldn’t drink and a D-List blogger (don’t worry kids, I haven’t forgotten about you), there were so many people I wanted to talk to but didn’t get a chance to and those I got to talk to but not for enough time. (Wow, that’s a lot of linking for a D-lister.)
If this woman, A Hen and Two Chicks (c) can put up with my bathroom habits, I can put up with her yummy baby.
Ok, now, back to the swag and all the crap I tried to avoid but nonetheless acquired in less than 24 hours of schmoozing and not boozing at SponsHer. Like back in ‘07, I set out not to accumulate things I didn’t need, but somehow I ended up with two huge vinyl bags of stuff that was mostly for girls. I left too early to donate it to charity like she suggested, so it ended up in the wondering hands of a three-year-old who thinks there are actually presents sitting in such bags that he’s actually going to like and use. Oh, how naive he is. If I was richer, I’d give it away to the D-listers, but really, I’ll end up losing my savings in postage fees.
The swag's so good, I haven't even unpacked it yet.
But I’m not down on SponsHer. I get why they need the sponsors, I can see why some events didn’t want babies, and as a former event planner, I know how hard it is to pull something like this off. Plus, I heard the keynote was kick-ass and I’m kicking myself for missing it. Maybe next year I’ll skip the sessions, the swag and just hang out in the lobby the whole time. And call it BlogHer once again.
Tagged as:
BlogHer conference,
BlogHer09
